​There’s a devils war inside my head

No truce to make as I take to bed

Called to arms but I’ve no defence

No strategy to war, no appeal to sense.

The battle redoubles in the intense heat

The enemy attacks,and consumes  my meat.

What is this force that eats away at me?

It’s injuries I feel, but cannot see

Sinking me in a shallow pond

Drowning me in deep despond?

 

Caustic drugs and chemo sessions

Can drive a man to such depressions

To indulge himself there’s little worse

Than this dread and morbid curse

And in impotence and frustration vent

A  life now shrivelled and almost spent.

Struggling in the fog of a chemical haze

To miss his meaning, and end his days

Forgetting the wonder of being alive

Laughing at the anxieties our fears will contrive

To celebrate the past, the sparkle and glitter

Not leave this world confused and bitter

So I shake a weary, exhausted head

And shuffle up in a sweat drenched bed

To those I loved, heartfelt gestures I send

For I do not fear, but welcome this end.

Death is at my shoulder, a marvel to know

I await contented to join its flow